Ever since I can remember, I've loved makeup. But in the past months I found myself constantly thinking about it, finding ways to get all the products that I wanted and especially if they were on sale lol (that was always my excuse). Now to a lot of people this may seem normal and think that the majority of girls have some sort of obsession- some for shoes, clothes, makeup, perfumes, etc. But this was beyond anything that I had experienced. I have makeup that I haven't even used. I just opened it to swatch it, but that's about it.
I couldn't leave my house without wearing at least: corrector, concealer, eyebrow gel, mascara, blush, powder, bronzer, eyeliner, and something for the lips... I felt very self conscious if I would walk out without makeup on. I remember one day when I had no makeup on and they told me "Hey Mayra" and I said "What? R u gonna tell me that I look sick cs Im not wearing makeup?" and they answered "Mmm, no, I was just gonna talk to u about something else". I'm pretty sure that I'm not the only one that has felt that way, but I realized that I need to be self-confident with our without makeup. God had been trying to tell me in SOOO many ways that my addiction for makeup was affecting me, but I simply didn't want to listen. I was too stubborn to admit that something like makeup could actually cause me problems. The first thing that I would do when I would get home or maybe even the last thing I would do before going to bed was watch makeup videos on youtube. I love them, but I began to blow everyone off just to watch them. I remember perfectly how it all started... It was a Saturday morning and I was wondering on how to style my hair differently... so decided to go on youtube and look it up... by the time I knew it I had already seen like 10 videos... created my own channel just to follow gurus and I was watching them on a daily basis- every time I had a chance. I dont think that there's anything wrong with watching videos (again), but when that takes over your life... I think we have a problem lol.
So this morning I woke up and remembered a girl on youtube- Beeyourself7- she had done a similar challenge to this and I told myself- "Why not?". I know that this whole journey will help me feel a lot more comfortable in my own skin and be self-confident regardless of whether I have makeup on or not. I also believe that this will help me get over my makeup obsession and most importantly help me build that personal relationship with God that I truly desire. I'm also wondering how my skin will look after 2 weeks... So day 1 of this journey has begun... anyone interested in taking on this challenge with me?
I find your story very inspiring Mayra. I too have this...I wouldn't say obsession?...but more of like a "thing" for Make-Up. Strangest thing is, I don't even wear it often. Unless I'm going to a special occasion or something, and sometimes not even then. Usually Make-Up tends to make a girl feel a lot more sexy and fearless, but it's our self-confidence that should make us feel that way. Lately, I have found myself to be real close to God and sometimes I stop to wonder..."Why?, Why now and not then?" It took me a while to understand that EVERYTHING happens for a reason and that reason we'll never know only Him. I also understand now that we are here for a purpose, and that purpose is to serve God. Anything and anyone who comes into our lives after that is simply just a Wonderful Blessing. You quoted,"I'm not saying that makeup is a bad thing, but I believe that when something begins to take control of your life that's when you have a problem."...and when I read that I had never seen it that way. But it's true. Sometimes we don't see these things but remember, God helps those who help themselves. I am willing to support you during this challenge because your such a dear friend of mine and I want nothing but a life full of success and happiness for you <3!
ReplyDeleteaddiction and compulsive behavior comes in many forms...i appreciate and applaud your brutal honesty...i look forward (is that the right term?) to watching this journey...good luck
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